“And they lived happily ever after…”

If you’ve ever read any disney story or fairy tales, i’m pretty sure you’ve come across this phrase that we’re very familiar with. I can imagine that this simple phrase evokes different feelings in different ones of us, especially after living life on planet earth, where things just don’t seem that “happy” after all. Some of us might even think that this is far fetched and too unrealistic given the world that we live in.

Well if it were taken on face value, without looking at the intricacies of things, i think it might just be something found in our imagination, and in heaven. But then again, i’m one who really thinks that Happily Ever Afters do happen. Just that we need to have a proper understanding of how this can happen.

Like many that feel that this is all too fairy tale statement in such a fallen world, yes i agree; if we were to expect that once we find “THE ONE” (which by the way i don’t exactly hold for this view), or like find someone that TRULY understands us (who can also be a good friend), then life suddenly becomes rosy, and everywhere we go flowers follow our trail. The dishes clean by themselves, the floor is clean every morning you wake up, and the hair of our partners always fall in perfect position with a glow of happiness and bliss on their faces.

So what then does Happily Ever After mean for me? I believe that in any relationship, and especially for this context a marriage or a courtship, i believe that Happily Ever After can happen, and is meant to happen because God created us for relationships. =) How then does this even happen? I believe that we first have to bust the myth, that through a relationship, our emptiness is filled, we suddenly become whole, and roses bloom everywhere we go. Well to some extent, yes! But if those are the reasons we go into a relationship, then we’re in for big trouble. Because you know what? Relationships require much effort.

This is also where my definition of Happily Ever After comes in. I believe in this when two individuals get together, their hearts are first towards God, then towards one another. Only then can a relationship truly blossom, and be a blessing to themselves and those around them. Does that mean that there will be no difficulties? Hahaha far from it! It actually means that there will be so much more difficulties! But through this process, you grow to learn more about yourself, your fears, your loves, your insecurities, your hopes etc. Not only that, you take in and embrace your partner’s fears, loves, insecurities, hopes and so on. It’s a growth process, and it requires much effort!

But i do believe that this is Happily Ever After, not that there’s no effort or difficulties involved. On the contrary as both individuals decide to walk together, they learn to depend on God more and more, and through that draw closer together. Embracing one another for who they are because of the love they have from God. So much effort and grace and the choice to love and forgive is involved.

And for those that are really young, i know that a relationship is something that’s very big for some of you. Maybe because of some emptiness, or the lack of love; which most of the time might not even be your fault. I say this not as someone high and mighty, but as someone who has also been through those times of emptiness and lack of love and support. It felt terrible and i longed for a relationship. But cliche as it might sound, this true belonging can only be found in our Lord Jesus. Yes we can’t see Him with our eyes, but i believe more and more, as you cry out to Him, He hears your prayers and reaches out to you. Save all that you’ve been given to someone that is really worth it because it’ll be all the more sweet =) I truly believe that. Hard as it might be, (and yes it is TERRIBLY HARD), it is possible cause i’ve been through it, and i know if God is faithful in my life, He is in yours too cause He can’t become unfaithful.

Through this post, i also recognize that some of us might already given much of ourselves to that person. Wherever you are, whatever stand you take, keep knowing that Jesus still loves you. Very very dearly for that matter. And He restores us so don’t give up hope, because He is our hope, and can still be that Happily Ever After.

So here’s to a happily ever after! =)

 

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